Girl on the Third Floor

JPV852

5.0

December 27, 2019

Some interesting moments amongst a lot of the nonsense I dislike from these supernatural horror movies that seem to make up the rules as they go (as a way to gin up some "scares"). CM Punk isn't a very charismatic actor though funny does have some shades of Bruce Campbell (could pass off as his son, actually) but I did like Trieste Kelly ...

Gimly

6.0

December 27, 2019

Basically a body horror, but the house is an extra body. It was okay. I know it's a very "in" thing at the moment to not have a single likable character in your horror movie, which is the route that _Girl on the Third Floor_ takes, but I personally don't dig that. _Final rating:★★½ - Had a lot that appealed to me, didn’t quite work a...

Kamurai

4.0

October 23, 2020

Empty watch, probably won't watch again, and can't recommend. There just isn't a lot to care about. A lot of awful stuff happens, but they don't build the story correctly. He's a jerk and a half so we don't care what happens to him, and we get a whole dramatic reveal of explanation all at once in the 3rd act, but Sarah Brooks is the ...

tmdb28039023

1.0

August 25, 2022

Girl on the Third Floor is the story of a house that wants to be the Overlook Hotel when it grows up, but this movie is to The Shining what CM Punk’s UFC stint is to his WWE career. A deeply troubled, heavily tattooed former attorney (yeah, right) named Don Koch (Punk) is seeking a fresh start. He buys a dilapidated old house in a Chi...