The Killer

Does anyone remember Baz Luhrmann's song "Sunscreen"? Well the narrative mantra provided here by assassin Michael Fassbender reminded me of some of the profundities of that lyric - though not as wittily. The remainder of this film, however, is unlikely to be conjuring up memories anytime soon. His meticulously planned kill takes out a poor, leather-clad, school mistress instead of the intended target and so he has to flee. Now one might assume that such a character would be un-spookable. Well, nope - not this one. He is actually a bit nervous as he takes the long route home to safety in the Dominican Republic. When he gets there, he discovers that it wouldn't have been that safe there either as his pal "Magdala" (Sophie Charlotte) has been seriously wounded in an assault on his remote home. Bent on revenge, he sets out to track down the offenders and ultimately determines to come face to face with the millionaire client. Now he hasn't quite got a Yellow Pages, but his detective work is carried out with rather brutal ease. We have the odd combat scene, a dog gets pretty zoned out with painkillers and the denouement - featuring a sparing contribution from Tilda Swinton - has precisely zero menace or sophistication to it. Fassbender is very easy on the eye, but the rest of this is about as derivative as it gets - a sort of distant cousin of "The Mechanic" (2011) and it's not really very good.