Batman & Robin

You know what? I quite enjoyed this. "Batman" (George Clooney) and his sidekick "Robin" (Chris O'Donnell) have to race to downtown "Gotham" to thwart the diamond-heisting plans of "Mr. Fries" - that's as in freeze not French - (Arnold Schwarzenegger) who is wreaking havoc so he can hopefully find a cure for a disease that has necessitated him keeping his beloved wife in stasis for years. Meantime, alter ego "Bruce Wayne" is at one of his company's many charity launches - this time for a giant telescope - when he encounters "Dr. Isley" (Uma Thurman) who demands that he help her in her quest to stop mankind from destroying the planet. Of course he is polite, but makes it clear that feeding and fuelling people is more important so she determines to take unilateral action. She's rather helped on that front by her megalomanic pal "Dr. Woodrue" with whom she has a bit of an altercation that sees her delivered of a new mono-syllabic henchman "Bane" (Jeep Swenson) and some new powers to manipulate the powers of nature. Scene set as she uses her new found skills to make just about everyone fall in lust with her and allies with "Fries" so both can destroy "Batman". Back at "Wayne" manor, the butler "Alfred" (Michael Gough) is feeling the early effects of the same disease that's debilitating "Mrs. Fries" but his visiting niece "Barbara" (Alicia Silverstone) seems to be way more than the delicate flower of a student she pretends to be. Can some of them unite to save the butler and maybe even the day? There's loads going on here and though it's pretty derivative from start to finish, I thought that the Salome-esque Thurman and Arnie were having fun making this daft enterprise, and that does come across as he trots out his lightly-poetic expressions about the "Bat-tenburg" whilst illustrating the truly destructive power of ice when in the hands of an heavily CGI-armed silver megalomaniac. It's a bit long, the action scenes are a bit repetitive and polystyrene plays as prominent a role as any of the actors but for me this is more entertaining than the films that try to sink us all in the psycho-babble of flashback-driven darkness that often accompanied the caped crusader. Not great, no - but not terrible, either. It's just hammed up fun.